In the last month, I was placed in a mental hospital by my husband because he was furious that I told him I was pregnant with twins and said that I could hear God and Jesus teaching me how to repent from being proud. I was alarmed when he said women cannot hear God in prayer only the husband can receive revelation. I had thought we believed the same religion. It was not what I was taught in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. We believe that God speaks to both men and women if they are trying to keep His commandments. In the hospital, I was told I couldn’t go home until I changed my beliefs and took psychotropic medicines even though I could see men and women suffering from the side effects listed on the package inserts. I had no right, it seemed, to decline meds though God told me not to use most of the ones offered and instead look for the more natural remedies I love. God is good and helped me in miraculous ways!
“…there are other harmful substances and practices that are not specified in the Word of Wisdom or by Church leaders. Members should use wisdom and prayerful judgment in making choices to promote their physical, spiritual, and emotional health.”
I have been praying about how to forgive him and what to do to forgive his family for helping to keep my children away from me. I wish this was easy. It will be necessary for me to repent of pride again for being angry even though I know it is just that they think on their own sins as well.
If you were reading strange things on my Facebook profile, page, or here on my blog, or received unusual phone calls or text messages about me from Clint, understand that I had no access to the internet while I was in the hospital. It was painful to read this was happening when God showed me that someone was trying to destroy my reputation. I could not find any signs except that someone tried to change my Facebook password while I was committed. This wasn’t possible but the problem was that my husband had access to all my blog, email, phone contacts, social media, and other passwords with a Power of Attorney so may have felt justified in changing my hobby which is a gift to God and has not received any income yet. I wish to thank you ahead of time, if you are able to show me what you saw this time during my hospital(s) stay(s). I say (s) because the week after I trusted him and came home from my aunt’s house to get clothes that fit, not my pre-pregnancy clothes he sent me (except for the jeans were maternity thankfully) in the hospital, and found he walked in to the house with social workers and had police bring me out of the house onto a stretcher (I chose to walk out on my own) to go to three more hospitals on two consiguiente días. I was not surprised as God told me in the hospital, him was going to send me away two more times but I had worried it would be years down the road after repenting and bring me back to our home. I have cried nearly every day for the last month and a half. I wish this time was the first of our troubles but am ashamed to say I was deceiving myself thinking he cared about me all these years. The time in the hospital brought me a way of realizing how subtle evil can be so I wish to apologize for exaggerating our relationship. Perhaps I wished to see it as nice when there were many narcissistic experiences that brought our family down as I remember begging God in tears for relief from the pain I felt occasionally and shutting out the fears much of the time. I don’t want to drag anyone down with the dirty thinking that created such big problems but I will be sharing some over the years as the political situation tends to justify this destructive ‘tendency’. So I will listen to ideas on how to fix any problems that occurred while I was being locked up. If you can send them to my email at firstname.lastname@example.org I will be grateful if you put “Aip” in the subject line to make it easier for me to find! I loved using the AIP (Autoimmune Protocol) Diet several times to help me heal from autoimmune problems brought on by the overwhelming emotions from a dysfunctional marriage. I will not be writing much for this next couple months since I am expecting triplets and hope to remarry soon. If you really want to hear what is happening, this will be best to send me a friend request or follow on my Facebook profile where I will post some things.
Thank you for being friends, family, and future friends!